9 Ways to Raise an Optimist

9 Ways to Raise an Optimist

We live in a hectic, stressful, political world that makes it easy to be pessimistic and depressed. However, these attitudes aren’t helpful and can actually be harmful. All parents wants their children to be happy, healthy, and optimistic about their future, but sometimes they can lose sight of how to accomplish that state of mind. Kids who are often sullen and dejected can eventually end up depressed, so it’s important to do what you can as a parent to help prevent that from happening. Here are 10 ways to make sure you are raising an optimist and not a pessimist.

1. Affection – The first step is to show your children tons of affection. Knowing they are loved and cared for is a big part of helping kids deal with adversity. Failures in life are easier to take when children know they are loved unconditionally and without judgement.
2. Praise – Always praise your child’s accomplishments and be specific when you do. Give them feedback that links their achievements to what they did to accomplish it. An example would be to state how all the extra studying paid off with a good grade on a test.  That is better than simply saying, "Great job, keep up the good work."
3. Monitor – Pay attention to what your child is watching on television, the games they play, and the books they read. You should monitor their activities to make sure they’re not exposed to too many bad influences. Also, make sure they’re not attempting to accomplish too much, as taking on more than they can reasonably handle can set them up for failure.
4. Be an example – Children will often mirror their parent’s attitudes, so be a good example. Kids will only learn to be optimistic if you show them how. Parents who are continually complaining or are pessimistic will pass those traits on to their children.
5. Reinforcement – When your child expresses optimism, be sure to comment on their great attitude. This positive reinforcement will put the emphasis on the desired behavior instead of focusing on the negative.
6. Accentuate the positive – When something bad happens, always try to find the bright side. If bad weather cancels an event, find something fun to do instead. Accentuate the positive by commenting how you wouldn’t have had so much fun if the picnic wasn’t cancelled.  During the 9-11 terrorist attack, the positive people would say, "Look for the helpers" so the children would focus less on the evil in the attack.
7. Minimize failures – Losing a championship or failing a test may seem like the end of the world, but children don't see it that way. Parents can raise optimists if they are successful at minimizing failures or by putting them into perspective. Show your children that there is always something to be learned from failures. 
8. Promote success – Encourage kids with age-appropriate activities they are able to excel in to promote success. Having unrealistic expectations only sets children up for failure, so make sure they’re not trying to do too much, especially at your request.
9. Laugh – The best way to encourage an optimistic attitude is with lots of laughter. Teach children how to laugh at themselves and not take everything so seriously. Laughing is the best way to diffuse a troubling situation.

Life is full of challenges and failures, so an optimistic attitude will go a long way to help your children deal with problems as they grow up. As adults, having this optimism will be an important way for them to achieve success and bounce back from failures. A positive outlook will help them in personal relationships and they can lead happy lives with better mental and physical health.

Remember: Prepare the child for the road, not the road for the child.

Happy Parenting!